Now I can text, Lilyflower!
by BBauzzie
Summary: One-shot. What would happen if Hogwarts students of the Marauder era owned phones? "Hello, my Llilyflower", "I want revenge on your manhood", "Omnivorous Malicious Gorrila?"... A lot could happen... Rated K for James' provocative innuendo.


**G'DAY MATES! THIS IS MY FIRST STORY ABOUT LILY AND JAMES... AND IT SHALL BE A ONE-SHOT! ENJOY MY RANDOMNESS! TAALLLYY-HOOOO**

**DISCLAIMER: NOPE. DONT OWN HARRY POTTER.**

**MagicWand**: Hello my LilyFlower

**_Lily_**: Oh dear god, please tell me you're Alice and this is simply a sick joke.

**MagicWand**: I would, but if we're gonna B a couple I don't want 2 keep secrets from U

**_Lily_**: First of all; how in Merlin's name did you get my number Potter?

**_Lily_**: Second; we are NEVER going to be a couple.

**_Lily_**: And third; for you contact name, MAGICWAND?! REALLY?!

**MagicWand**: first, magic DUH!

**MagicWand**: second, denial is not pretty love

**MagicWand**: third, yes because I have a magic wand... If you know what I mean ;)

**_Lily_**: …

**MagicWand**: Ahh, is that a blush I C?

**_Lily_**: OMG where the bloody hell are you?!

**MagicWand**: What's omg again? Omnivorous Malicious Gorilla?

**MagicWand**: and not telling ;)

**_Lily_**: In class. Shut up.

**MagicWand**: OoOoOoh Transfiguration! Perfect!

**MagicWand**: LILY I LOVE YOU!

**MagicWand**: LILY I DOOOO!

**MagicWand**: WHEN WE'RE APART MY HEART BEATS ONLY FOR YOOOUUUUU!

**_Lily_**: I hate you.

**MagicWand**: hate is such a strong word.

**_Lily_**: I have detention.

**MagicWand**: Yay! Now we have it together!

**_Lily_**: …

**_Lily_**: You totally planned that.

**MagicWand**: Yes I did, dear Lilykins.

**MagicWand**: I'm not a Marauder for nothing :D

**_Lily_**: I hope your manhood is maimed by next period.

**MagicWand**: And the same to your ladyhood

**MagicWand**: by me

**MagicWand**: in my dorm

**MagicWand**: :D

**MagicWand**: :)

**MagicWand**: :-/

**MagicWand**: :-\

**MagicWand**: :-|

**MagicWand**: :-(

**MagicWand**: Ah so your ignoring me again

**MagicWand**: Don't 4get I can see you checking these messages.

**_Lily_**: Where are you?

**MagicWand**: not telling

**_Lily_**: Where are you?

**MagicWand**: not telling

**_Lily_**: Where are you?

**MagicWand**: not telling

**_Lily_**: WHERE ARE YOU?!

**MagicWand**: Just because U use caps and are making an adorable irritated face, doesn't change my answer

**_Lily_**: If I see you

**_Lily_**: I will hex you

**MagicWand**: Now Evans, that is not very Gryffindor of you, now is it?

**_Lily_**: Neither is you STALKING ME!

**MagicWand**: Touché

**_Lily_**: I think it's actually quite Slytherin of you

**MagicWand**: …

**MagicWand**: Too far

**_Lily_**: Hello?

**_Lily_**: Finally

* * *

**MagicWand**: How's it going my sexy minx?

**_Lily_**: I knew it was too good to be true.

**MagicWand**: I think U should go put on a warmer cloak. It's snowing Hippogrifs out there.

**MagicWand**: Stop trying to lose me, it's no use.

_**Lily**_: Well aren't you sweet

**MagicWand**: I try. Anyway, U know what else is sweet?

_**Lily**_: Revenge?

_**Lily**_: On your manhood?

**MagicWand**: Ohhhhhh feisty little witch, aren't ya?

**MagicWand**: Anyway, no.

**MagicWand**: But Honeydukes is.

**MagicWand**: maybe we could go together sometime?

**_Lily_**: In your dreams, Potter.

**MagicWand**: U have no idea what I dream about

**_Lily_**: So what do you dream about then...

**MagicWand**: I'd rather not say in case Sirius and Remus find my phone

_**Lily**_: …

_**Lily**_: I'm putting my phone on silent

**MagicWand**: Ohhhhh getting kinky now are we, Lilyflower?

_**Lily**_: What makes you think that?

**MagicWand**: Cuz I put your vibrate on ;D

**_Lily_**: What the… look Potter, we're in Potions now. Professor Slughorn is gonna find our phones. Just be quiet.

**MagicWand**: But this is so amusing :( I SHALL STAY!

_**Lily**_: please don't.

**MagicWand**: How about I list everything I love about you?

**_Lily_**: Again, please don't.

**MagicWand**: The way you walk is sexy.

**_Lily_**: go away

**MagicWand**: the way you talk is sexy.

**MagicWand**: the way you sexily flip your sex-filled sexy red hair is sexy.

_**Lily**_: Go away!

**MagicWand**: the way you yell at me is sexy.

**MagicWand**: the way you punch me is sexy.

**MagicWand**: the way you hex me is sexy.

**_Lily_**: when did this turn into the reasons why your a machochist?

**MagicWand**: the way you diss me is sexy.

_**Lily**_: I will throw something at you.

**MagicWand**: the way you turn pages in the library is sexy.

**MagicWand**: the way you scream my name at the top of your lungs while your having an orgajsjrjdjnAKAFrjcjjichfH

**_Lily_**: I told you I'd throw something at you

**MagicWand**: HARSH!

**Lily**: I am now throwing my phone in the lake. Tally-ho.

**WHEGWHEGWHEG.. I made this a couple of moths ago and was like... "Huh... I still have that... KEWL. TO FANFICTION, I GOOO!" ~And here I am~ *dashing smile* does ****_dashing_**** work for women? Dunno. Anyway, I'm sorry for the inconsistency with punctuation in this fix but I was trying to place it in a way James would write... With exceptional spelling and such... I HOPE YA LIKE!**

**COMMENT!**


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